i've got lots of things to be thankful for. but mostly i'm thankful for the people i'm surrounded with. everyone has helped shape me for the last year. i'm hoping that the changes are for the best. i've gone through the whole spectrum of happy, sad, indifferent and selfishly taken everyone around me along for the ride.
i'm sorry to say that i am still struggling with my responsibilities. i feel good inside when people recognize what i am going through, even more so when they say that they understand it. but what i don't share is the constant tugging that happens. i daydream a lot. a consequence of which is that i set myself up for dissappointments based on personal fairy tales. i want to get away with shirking my duties. i want to get on a bus and dissappear. i want to take care of only myself. but i will never be able to live myself if i do. the luxuries i allow myself then are hopefully inconsequential and fleeting.
i've got a long way to go to be the man i hope to be. but i've gone far enough to be old at trying, that's the best anyone can really do.
so, i want to thank everyone who has to deal with me in long spans of time. thank you for not jumpng across the room and stranggling me. in the next year of my life i'm sure to find new ways of annoying each and everyone of you.
thank you for helping me feel better about myself.
